Yes, the media is hitting with "breaking news" this weekend about Marshawn Lynch being investigated for sexual assault and domestic violence (see AOL Sports Blog). He is a star football player bound for the NFL (according to draft experts) and so this report is gaining national attention.
Already, I am reading blog comments and online posts attacking the female. You've read and heard all the stereotypical excuses before such as, "Women are always false reporting to get money or revenge." When people engage in statements that are based on victim-blaming, ask the person, "What percentage of sexual assault cases involve a gigantic financial payout to the survivor?" Now the person might respond with, "Do you know?" If you don't know, be honest. Say, "Look, you are the one making a very serious allegation against the female. You are the one generalizing about women who report being sexually assaulted. Not me. Can you back it up with PROOF? If not, how about not saying anything until you know more information?"
We need to hold people accountable for their words. Get people thinking. Ask this person, "Of all the women you know, do you think at least one of them was sexually assaulted in their lifetime?" Most people will answer, "Yes." Continue the conversation with, "How do you think it would make that survivor who you know feel to hear you degrading another survivor for coming forward? Many, many survivors never tell anyone because they are afraid of the exact judgements you are placing on this woman."
What can you do to make a difference? When you hear people discussing this case, move the conversation from victim-blaming to an open discussion about how prevalent sexual assault is in our world. Talk about how society frequently reacts to news stories of sexual assaults by turning the blame on the survivor. Give the people you are talking with resources to learn more. One of the reasons we were honored to be involved in the Voices of Courage: Inspiration from Survivors of Sexual Assault book (www.voicesofcourage.com) is because those 12 survivors do a spectacular job of showing the various issues facing survivors today.
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